"above all, never give up hope"

Shania got a call at the hospital from Karen this week and got very excited while on the phone. When she got off the phone she told me with big smiles that Zack from Canadian Idol said that he would like to wear one of Shania's Sunflower of Hope t-shirts on the show. And true to his word, last night he wore a grey shirt, that was beautifully decorated by his son and daughter. He even stood up and showed everyone Shania's shirt and wished Shania well. This was an incredible thoughtful, kind and generous thing to do. Thank you again Zack, Lisa,Maddie(Lisa's daughter and Shania's friend) and CTV's Canadian Idol for putting a huge smile on Shania's face. You guy's Rock!!! Shania is feeling much less pain now that she has had her five sessions of radiation. The palliative care team also seems to have a good mix of pain medication for Shania now and Shania was hoping to come home last night. But she didn't get her CTscan until yesterday afternoon, and the Doctor on call yesterday said that Shania has some water in her left chest putting pressure on her lung. They want to use a needle to extract this fluid before it starts to restrict her breathing. This fluid is most likely from the cancer in Shania's lungs. We didn't here anything from Doctor Baruchel as to the status of this cancer in her lungs yet, but will today. Karen Fung is Shania's Haematology/oncology Social worker. And she asked Shania what she would like for a wish from the Children's wish foundation. Shania said that she wants to go on a Disney Cruise, so she talked to the Doctors and they said that they are worried about Shania's pain right now, and that the medical staff on a cruise wouldn't be able to take care of this safely. So Karen Fung asked Shania if their was anything else that she would like for a wish. Shania said that she wants her own phone line and grey/black phone in her bedroom and a pair of Heallies( The shoes with the wheels at the back). I offered Shania that I would get the phone and heallies right now at a store if she wants to pick something else for a wish. But she told Karen Fung and I that we both aren't working right now and that she doesn't think that we can afford it. This is the Shania that I am so proud to be the father of !!! She is always thinking about others before herself. She never ceases to amaze me. I am having a hard time typing this because of the tears in my eyes right now, as often happens when I write about this gracious family that I'm so privileged to be a part of. The other day I was down stairs in the Hospital getting Shania pistachios and I stopped into the library that they have. The first book I looked at was a thick book called "Choices in healing", And this is the page that I opened it to "Never giving up hope" . This is a bit of what it said: This chapter is about the use of hope in cancer. A wise man once said to a group of cancer patients in the Commonweal Cancer Help Program: " Above all, never give up hope. You can fight for your life, even in the face of tremendous odds. Give yourself permission to hope, even in the face of all the statistics that physicians may present to you. Statistics are only statistics. They are not you. There is no such thing as false hope. I saw the truth of this in my father's experience, and in the experience of many other people with cancer who have far outlived their prognosis". As you can guess I signed this book out and brought it up to Shania's room. When I went to open this thick book on healing(conventional and non conventionally) I opened it to the same page again without even trying. There are six hundred pages in this book, oh my, this gave me goose bumps. What are the odds of doing that twice. Karen was at the school the other day and noticed that their was a poem posted on the bulletin board by the front office for Shania. We asked Mrs Porter if she could find out if the young man who wrote this minds if we put it on Shania's blog and here it is:
God gave you the strength,
he gave you the power.
Then with that, you made a sunflower.
You have given hope to thousands of others,
you made it easier for children and there mothers.
We can't feel your pain,
we can't feel your sorrows.
We can only hope for a better tomorrow.
We will face this together, you won't be alone.
We will fight this forever, until you get home.

By Eric Poulos


Thank you Eric for this heart felt poem.
Sincerely, with love,
Shayne,Karen,Shania&Sannon.